America Part 3: Home
Party on the decks! (The fam minus me)
View from the decks...
Little Priss with her little Jasmine...
A typical dinner at the Beach house (seriously)...
I'm home!
My adorable niece, Gracia ... playing in the "wilderness" out front.
Beaches on the rocks .. (minus Nathan, Laura and little GG)
We love to hike. Berea. Beautiful flowers and sunshine. I miss the hikes.
I was so excited to take a break back in the States, but once I boarded the plane bound for America all these strange emotions welled up. All of a sudden I had a fear of leaving Morocco, a fear of returning to the other world I used to live in, of remembering what it was like to have the freedom of hopping in a car and driving to Wal-Mart, of throwing on a little dress and not worrying if it covered the appropriate amount of skin, of not being called to in French, of actually understanding everything everyone said to me, air conditioning, and mostly... being close to family and loved ones ... and realizing how much I missed them. Maybe I wasn't wise to remind myself in the middle of my service.
Once I stepped off the plane and met my friend Meliss, all was forgotten in the happiness of seeing her. The weeks were filled and busy, and each moment with a sister, parent or girlfriend cherished. And America? People say you go through a lot of culture shock. I didn't notice it a bit... and then I did. America was a America. Just like I remembered. It didn't feel to fast-past, clean, chaotic, like people say... it felt normal. Morocco is Morocco and America is America. It was a relief to be able to separate the two.
After a little while I began noticing that I would find it rude if someone didn't have time to take off work or drop everything else for me (which lots of people really did) ... in Morocco family and friends are priority and anything else is just busyness that can wait hours or days. I think that mentality had somehow worked its way into my subconscious. And greeting friends. It was so good to see them ... but I'm used to lunches here where someone you haven't seen in a day treats it like a year, demands where you disappeared to and asks you a million questions. Lots of people did ask me lots of questions, but when they didn't... it felt odd.
On the other hand, I felt like most people I had kept in touch with quite well and knew exactly what was going on in their lives, thanks to blogs and cell phones, Skype and email. Technology really makes the U.S. feel very close in a way.
I bid my parents and siblings goodbye, I tried to make it casual. I'm a rather emotional person, but I felt myself somewhat trying to suppress the reality of leaving all of them again for another 18 months. Twice what the last period was... I know I can do it (with God's grace), but thinking about it didn't help. I think I subconsciously decided it will be easier to live a life of coming and going across seas and country borders if every departure isn't agonizing. I just hope I don't start hiding true feelings in the process.
I feel very blessed to have had a chance to see everyone for a happy two weeks.
View from the decks...
Little Priss with her little Jasmine...
A typical dinner at the Beach house (seriously)...
I'm home!
The Play Mart Heiresses at the factory ...
On Wednesday we held a board meeting. Kinda nice to be there for it, even though I'm not involved in any of the day-to-day operations right now.
On Wednesday we held a board meeting. Kinda nice to be there for it, even though I'm not involved in any of the day-to-day operations right now.
My adorable niece, Gracia ... playing in the "wilderness" out front.
Beaches on the rocks .. (minus Nathan, Laura and little GG)
We love to hike. Berea. Beautiful flowers and sunshine. I miss the hikes.
Joint birthdays/anniversary party for Mom & Dad, Laura and I.
I was so excited to take a break back in the States, but once I boarded the plane bound for America all these strange emotions welled up. All of a sudden I had a fear of leaving Morocco, a fear of returning to the other world I used to live in, of remembering what it was like to have the freedom of hopping in a car and driving to Wal-Mart, of throwing on a little dress and not worrying if it covered the appropriate amount of skin, of not being called to in French, of actually understanding everything everyone said to me, air conditioning, and mostly... being close to family and loved ones ... and realizing how much I missed them. Maybe I wasn't wise to remind myself in the middle of my service.
Once I stepped off the plane and met my friend Meliss, all was forgotten in the happiness of seeing her. The weeks were filled and busy, and each moment with a sister, parent or girlfriend cherished. And America? People say you go through a lot of culture shock. I didn't notice it a bit... and then I did. America was a America. Just like I remembered. It didn't feel to fast-past, clean, chaotic, like people say... it felt normal. Morocco is Morocco and America is America. It was a relief to be able to separate the two.
After a little while I began noticing that I would find it rude if someone didn't have time to take off work or drop everything else for me (which lots of people really did) ... in Morocco family and friends are priority and anything else is just busyness that can wait hours or days. I think that mentality had somehow worked its way into my subconscious. And greeting friends. It was so good to see them ... but I'm used to lunches here where someone you haven't seen in a day treats it like a year, demands where you disappeared to and asks you a million questions. Lots of people did ask me lots of questions, but when they didn't... it felt odd.
On the other hand, I felt like most people I had kept in touch with quite well and knew exactly what was going on in their lives, thanks to blogs and cell phones, Skype and email. Technology really makes the U.S. feel very close in a way.
I bid my parents and siblings goodbye, I tried to make it casual. I'm a rather emotional person, but I felt myself somewhat trying to suppress the reality of leaving all of them again for another 18 months. Twice what the last period was... I know I can do it (with God's grace), but thinking about it didn't help. I think I subconsciously decided it will be easier to live a life of coming and going across seas and country borders if every departure isn't agonizing. I just hope I don't start hiding true feelings in the process.
I feel very blessed to have had a chance to see everyone for a happy two weeks.
posted by Rachel Beach | 12:05 PM
1 Comments:
Miss Rach! It sounds like your time at home was wonderful! 18 months will fly by...and who knows, maybe we'll meet in Italy next Spring! Wouldn't that be fun!?! I'm workin' on it!!Miss you, love you, and always praying for you!
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